happyfish

My research essay is due in twelve hours. I have almost exactly half the word count, very little to add and I'm so exhausted I can barely think.

This is not a good thing. I'm actually thinking about just going to bed, getting up early to finish it and then hand it in whenever it's done, fuck going to AHIS.

I hate research papers.

oh, and I'm a complete asshole too, but that's not entirely my fault.

I should have been at work at six. Instead I went to Caro's dad's house and drank rum. If they aren't going to let me quit and not going to pay me, they should get used to me not working. I mean, seriously, send me my damn money. I bloody earned it.
Went to Heritage Park yesterday with Caro and Sade. Had to get up early in order to do so, but it was pretty worth it, anyway. We did the entire park, which means we went into all of the houses, went on all the rides, poked through all the stores. We were done, and very tired, by about three. It was such a beautiful day, though it got really hot after a while. Still, even in my binder I wasn't dying. I was never once introduced as Bert too, ha! xD
Then we went to Tessa's place for brownies and lime-aid. Did the time-warp, watched my last Fake Mustache performance and then played the question-answer game. Oh, the question-answer game. I'm wondering if I'll be able to look at Roy without giggling madly. More so than usual. >.>
squirrels...
Today Caro and I did basically nothing. We eventually got off our asses and went down to Marda Loop in order to discover that almost everything is closed on Sunday. I did manage to find a jasper worry-stone, which makes me happy. I was sort of looking for one. Then went to Caro's dad's place, drank rum, played the game of life and ate stuff. Caro says next time she'll paint one of the little people markers purple for me so I'm not stuck with the pink or blue conundrum when I play Life again. :)
Also, this Thursday is Fake Mustache, and part of it is the drag king contest for those who've been performing for less than six months. Basically me, and a bunch of people I don't know. Everyone in Calgary (more specifically Red, Tracy and Lacey) come to the Soda Thursday at seven-thirty or I'll hate you forever. You will not regret it.  buaha.

Swing was amazing! There was this workshop thing that was going on during the day (which we didn't go to, even though it would've been cool) and they taught people how to steal partners. So that's what people did, all night. XD There was even this whole 'stealing circle' thing, like a birthday circle but with no special person who had to stay in the whole time. It was also to a super-fast song. Everyone left sort of early, but most of them had been dancing all day. It was still uber fun.
Blanketforts are very nice. :P
Hrm, yes, and that's all that's really happened. Spent most of today being completely unproductive, which was also very nice. Now I'm going to go eat supper and listen to this CD that Caro gave me. Perhaps I may have to sharpen my spork. We shall have to see.

So, they cleaned the floors at work a couple of days ago. Apparently the grout between the tiles is actually light grey and not black. O.o Who would've thought? It also looks dirtier than it ever did before, just because there's now grey and black splotches between the tiles instead of it being almost all black.
A random high-ranking (I'm sure) guy showed up and was toured around the bakery today, right when I was dumping the bread. Which was too small, because I took it out of the proofer too early. Crap on a stick. I didn't get into trouble, though. My supervisor just kind of mentioned it and they moved on. Probably had more important things to worry about.

It was really windy today when I walked out to catch the bus. A north wind, though, not a west one. Well, it was sort of north-west, but more north than west ^-^;;. Hopefully the perpetual chinook we've been having since the end of December is finally moving off and we can get some real snow! I still haven't had a snow-ball fight, or gone sledding or anything! It's kind of disappointing.

Snow, damnit! I want to go sledding!

I don't really have anything else to say. I just had a random urge to update my blog, even though nothing of importance has really happened. Except the fanfic Caro and I are writing, which is still completely devoid of a plot. Ah well. I think she wants to write some more of it tonight, but I have things that I really ought to be doing. Like my harmony homework and practicing my piano. Also might want to clean the house, b/c there's people coming over tomorrow.

omg! Movie night tomorrow! I can't believe it's almost Friday!

Yes, I did actually go see Underworld Evolution on the opening night. And my friend actually bit me (the prat, better hope Ben doesn't notice). Ugg, well...I had fun, somehow. The movie itself was mostly gratuitous blood and gore, with random sex scenes thrown in. Wow, that actually sounds like most of the movies that Hollywood makes. XD If you want a deep, moving, well-thought-out movie, go see Brokeback Mountain or something, because the only good thing about this was Kate Beckinsdale running around in tight leather and being all sexy and blue-eyed and stuff.
Ok, enough with the movie review or whatever.
Swing tomorrow! Yay! *quivers with anticipation*

Did you ever think that what you planned to do all your life wasn't what you really wanted to do at all? That you wanted to do something even more impossible than before, something you weren't even sure you could do, no matter what people said. But it haunted you like a bad dream, and late at night you'd write in your journal: "I don't want to do this anymore. I want to do this."

Then you'd wake up in the morning and think you were crazy. It could never happen.

Never, ever.

What if the future scares me?

I'm sorry, Sirius. I didn't get your letter until a few days ago. (I suppose it could be considered a 'letter,' no matter how unorthodox and illegible it actually was. Ignoring the fact that it was written in my old journal, which I dropped before Christmas holidays.) I think the owl got mis-directed or blown off-course or something. I'm sorry that you had to go through all that shit because of me. It was an impulse, and a stupid one. I should have ignored it, but I didn't.

I'm sorry. It was my fault.

Let's never speak of this again.

~ Remus

Why, oh Gods, why is it so bloody cold out?
Bah.
Humbug.
Etc.

On that topic, the first Xmas Carol performance was yesterday, although I feel a whole lot better if I think of it like a dress rehersal. Especially because Joanne was yelling out some people's forgotten or flubbed lines. That really pissed me off. I mean, I thought this was a performance. You're not supposed to go back and fix things in a performance! Prompting is just fine and dandy, but Joanne was like 'Oh no! you missed this line that wasn't really necessary anyway. I'm going to yell it out so now every one knows that you've messed up.'
Why is she directing this? She's a musician. She knows very, very little of drama.
Next performance: Sunday. Start praying.

Yay! I'm going swing dancing tomorrow! I love swing dancing. It has practically taken over my life. I can turn almost any conversation back to swing dancing. And Alex is coming (hopefully). Note to self: call Alex and get him the information. Also: call Caro and see if Stephen is giving us a ride. A ride would be nice. It's really too cold to go outside. It's supposed to go up to 8 on Tuesday, and I really hope it does. That would be very nice.
Oh, and just because I think you'd be interested: Alex asked me out last Sunday. And I said no. He could have been my first boyfriend, but I really don't like him that way.

So. I had a two-hour dance rehearsal yesterday evening for our musical. Which happens to be coming up pretty fast. The dancing rehearsal meant I was spinning in circles for two hours. Mmmmm...dizziness. And I totally did a Willy Wonka on this little girl (whose name is Sara) when I was there. With the whole finger thing and patronizing high-pitched voice...I'm so ashamed. At least I didn't call her 'little girl.' That would have been worse. It must have been really, really annoying.
Bad Janine! Bad!
Yay! It's Friday! And Caro and I might go see GoF anyway, even if she can't get a hold of her friend.
Ach, I don't know what else to say. It's all like rainy and windy and stuff. I don't want to go to work. I want to sit at home and drink hot chocolate and watch Benny and Joon.
Shoebox project is awesome. I've never read anything that made me want to squeal so much. *sighs dreamily*

Wow. Not much has happened, really. Just working and stuff. Went to odango's place the day before yesterday and tried to talk to her about dæmons. Got the feeling that she doesn't really care. *sigh* We also got all excited because today's international talk like a pirate day, and we don't have any pirate costumes. >.< Not that it matters, for me. I'm going to work and have to wear a stupid, ugly, too-big uniform. Ah, I've got a crush on this chick there. Except she's turned out to be two chicks who look very much alike, and now I don't know which one I have the crush on. Augh. Ahem. ARR. That's better.
I had this weird dream last night. I don't know if I can even explain it, but I'll try. There was a ski hill, and we were going up the chair lift/t-bar thing. I'm not really sure which. I'm also not sure who exactly I was with, but she was a friend. Then, I was a slave or something, and something happened. An emergency, like. This lady gave me this...thing...out of metal and told me to go to building four. So I ran around in the snow trying to find it. I did, and they made me lay down with others like me, and chained me to the floor. The person I was with before came in later. I had something to pass to her, but she was on the other side of the room, and I obviously couldn't get to her. So I gave it to the person beside me, and they passed it on. There were free people watching us, making sure we didn't do anything. There was this feeling in the dream, though, that sort of stayed with me. It has something to do with what I'm doing today, but I'm not sure I can analyze it.
I wanna see the corpse bride!!! Soooo badly, you have no idea. >

Wow, another sporadic journal entry. GO me!! (note sarcasm) Ok, so I've been busy. I don't even know when I updated this last, and I'm too lazy to check, so this will just be what's happening with me now, and not what's happened since I last came here.
Well, I did come out to my best friend. And she was like "wow, don't tell your parents." which was kinda disappointing because it wasn't really a reaction. You know, this is really important to me right now, and all I get is, "when you go soul-searching, be sure to send me back a pretty postcard"? WTF!!! and besides, I've already BEEN soul-searching. did she think i'd tell her without THINKING about it first???
It rained here. Now it smells like dust. Oh, and i think i'm bi, but i'm still not sure.
goddammit.