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Today is a good day to sit in sunbeams and dream of summer. This morning I lay down in a sunbeam with my cat and pulled up my shirt so that the sun hit my belly and life was good and I remembered last summer in Ontario with the humidity and the rain on the roses. It's weird how I thought of that and not other things, but it was actually nice to be with family then, and be spoiled by my grandparents and all that. Back when I used to eat meat and things were simpler. It's weird how it wasn't even a year ago and yet it's relegated to 'the good old days.' It's nice to remember a time with family when we just were and there weren't overt expectations of stuff. Maybe this summer, even with it's potential for parental disappointment and yelling arguements there'll still be times where I'll sit on the front steps with them in the morning sunshine and we'll just talk about how nice the weather is. How much better it is here than it is in Saudi.
Strange how a little sunshine and a crayon drawing of a purple house and a llama can teach me hope, despite the fact that I may or may not have things to hope for. Sometimes I just need to remember that life is good, somehow. That even with the complications and the angst that there's always going to be sunbeams to sit in when I need them. I might not be happy 100% all the time, but I have moments and - sometimes - they're enough.
Strange how a little sunshine and a crayon drawing of a purple house and a llama can teach me hope, despite the fact that I may or may not have things to hope for. Sometimes I just need to remember that life is good, somehow. That even with the complications and the angst that there's always going to be sunbeams to sit in when I need them. I might not be happy 100% all the time, but I have moments and - sometimes - they're enough.
